With the cooperation of the Crazy Like Me Correspondent, The Home Office has uncovered the
TOP SEVEN REASONS FLOYD LANDIS FAILED HIS DRUG TEST
7. All men's testosterone levels were elevated when they heard Christie Brinkley might be available.
6. Hearty pre-test breakfast of Rocky Mountain Oysters.
5. Someone substituted one of Lance Armstrong’s samples.
4. Dehydrated from strict training regimen of binge drinking.
3. High levels of artificial testosterone run in his family.
2. Mennonites use testosterone for Communion instead of wine.
1. Shook hands with Barry Bonds right before giving the sample.
Why only seven and not ten, you ask? You get what you pay for.